The way you view dating and how you do it changes over the course of your life, but one thing can and should remain the same – dating can be enjoyable. So, if you have made up your mind to have fun and get some positive emotions out of the experience in your senior years, let’s get started.
How finding love after 50 differs from what you had in youth?
Few things change radically when you grow in years. Some of them change for better, but others offer new challenges.
- Environmental change
In your teens or 20s, you mostly were surrounded by other single people. So, you had an environment favorable for dating. Many young men and women around you were available for a relationship. That changes when you are in the 50s. Singles become scarcer, and the environment is different.
- Reasons for being single
That changes too. When you are young, you are “naturally” single, so to say. But in the senior years, some of us become single due to the death of the partner or because of the divorce. These are traumatic experiences and getting back on the dating stage, we have to learn how to cope with our past and the past of our new partner.
- Quality of partners
This is a good change. In youth, you see the future potential of the person you date, but you have no idea how they will turn out. When you date being over 50, you know for sure. People become of higher quality. They know who they are and what they want or who they want in life.
- Puzzle complexity
When we enter relationships, we have a puzzle to fathom out. We have two different personalities with their preferences, dreams, situations and pursuits, as well as ambitions. And they need to fall in line with each other to become a couple. In the senior years, that is even more complicated. You have your past, your kids, your loans, houses, jobs, etc.
As you see, things change, and some of them become more challenging, but still it does not mean you cannot find your love and meaningful relationships in this season of life.
50+ dating rules:
1. Do not hide your personality
We all want people we like to like us back. So, at times we hide who we are being afraid to push them away. You could do that in your 20s or even 30s, but not in 50s. It’s time to finalize your personality, polish it so to say and let it shine. If they are not into you, well… it’s not your person!
2. You can flirt again!
If you have been married for decades, surely this skill has become a little rusty. But, you can and should get it out and dust it well. Flirting makes dating appealing and fun. Even if you did not know how to do it well in the past, now’s your chance to master the art.
3. Put yourself back up on the dating market
Yes, it is scary! You have been off that market for so long. What if no one wants you? What if they do not like you? Well, you have to overcome all those “what if” and just do it and keep on doing it! It’s not a one-time thing. Keep on looking and knocking and ye shall find! It’s a process rather than an event.
4. Be a happy person
You cannot afford the luxury of misery in your senior years. You have no time to waste; not a moment to spare! And by now you should know the truth: there is the only person in the world responsible for your happiness. That’s YOU! So, be happy and bring that touch of joy to your dates. It’s one of the things that make you a very attractive person.
5. Do not give up
You are old enough to know that things rarely work out the way you plan or want them the first time. It’s Ok. You can live with that, right? So, be prepared that some dates would be disappointing. Love at first sight? Well, you’ve been there, done that and got the t-shirt. Get over it and do not give up until you find the person to love and be loved by.
6. View dating as some fun social outlet
Getting too serious about it may only increase your frustration. So, don’t be. Think of dating as of some social activity. You get out, have fun together, and if you get lucky, you start dating or even fall in love. Such approach saves you much heartache.
7. Get your dating outfits ready
Yes, you still have to look your best, so take your time and put together at least three different dating outfits. And do not be too conservative. The world is changing and going out to dinner or cinema is not the only option anymore. Dates become more casual. People (even seniors) are taking walks in the park, ride bikes or do yoga during their dates. So, have at least one casual cute outfit for such activities.
8. Be passionate
It’s not about the passion for another person. You need to have an interest in life. Something besides the dating that makes you want to wake up in the morning and makes your life interesting. It’s much easier to find a good date if you two share a passion. So, once you have it or start the search for it, do some out of the box dates. Join a dating weight loss group or go to the cooking or potting class. Finding a new interest in life may help you to find your love, too.
As you see, this information on dating as a senior may assist you in to enjoy the process, make it fun and make it work for you! Bon voyage!